seafood coffee and an explosion

An attempt at poetry, listing, or merely creative/realistic writing that I should be doing in a journal, however am exposing for all to see

Sleepy eyes and frizzed nesty hair
Wanting home coffee to have more kick

academic vocabulary but sticking with the basics
Turquoise earrings as color to my neutral pallet
 Writing speeches on seafood and marriage

Grey bracelet now brassed from the hot tub
 Sperry top siders Leather soles finally at my feet

Being told that 25 is so young, but feeling aged, caught between youth and reality
Hate being talked down to for being young, but fearing acting too old at work
Wanting to put red in my hair, streaks and big shirts and skirts
Sperrys will have to do for casual Tuesday
Mix between creative and relational
Being strong and professional mixed with feeling and feeling bad and listening and bringing perspective

Looking at maps and being annoyed at how people think travelling will solve problems
But wanting to travel, setting my eyes on the next, but actually being satisfied with the here. With the now. With the Pasadena with the Monrovia work with the chang thai bistro with the charles shaw with the brie and cheese with the not running since half marathon with the coffee in reusable rei mug with the not having to take the metro to work having not to walk on dog poop on the sidewalk having family close having a one bedroom apartment having it hot in the summer and cold in the winter having swimming pool that sometimes has dead bees and flowers floating having tiki cups from 99c store and most community living on Madison ave

The hear, here, and now

Getting caught in my mind
Not saying, not sharing, not wanting to buy gifts. List of weddings to give to, birthdays and babies
But not wanting to think or buy or give for fear its not enough not enough thought into it, not enough thought so whats the point

Missing scott
Sibling comradery of making fun of parents ways and laughing at weird sayings like tiny tots or frittata
New jersey is too far from California
Oregon is too far as well

Just burned my tounge on microwaved coffee from this morning, saying ow, and listening to my cubicle mate tap his foot, peering over the wall and seeing him watch youtube drum videos
Ladies talking about mens wrong doings and men annoyed with ladies gabbing
Coworkers adopting babies from Ethiopia, tan from vacation, frustrated with budget restrictions and yet still here

Dows dropping, double dipping, inflation
Recession for past 3 years
3 years since ive been an adult, out of college, a professional, in the real World
What will it be like in the next….
What would it look like to live in a good economy
Will we ever see that again
Do we want to be the best the top the number one
Im tired of writing and need to write and think more about marriage and seafood
It will make sense

And I don't want to re read this because it’s an explosion of mind and brain and not wanting to really work and think about emails and friends who have gone or self who has gone or the outside or what is to come
So adios friend or foe whoever you are reading
Explosion [say with accent] of mind, brain or number 3 as niece abby says
Caio, la revedere, adieu

2 comments: said...

babe- this is great. really, really great.

Noelle Ritter said...

i really love this. the color. the honesty. just being caught- all put into words. thanks C.